wyldefyre's rants

I woke up today wondering why there is so much hypocracy in the world, from top government officials, ceo's of companies, professionals, doctor's, lawyer's, and down the line to friends and family and even the local dry cleaner!  I'm fed up with it.  We have to listen, dissect, probe, analyze every word to get at the truth and sometimes you don't get it.  It's so rare to find someone who is "what you see is what you get" type of person.  I'd rather be around someone who is an open book and accept or reject their flaws and failings than to listen to the hype and bravado and frankly........lies.

Although I have some very good friends that I love and adore I also have some who I'm considering removing from my life.  It's a constant battle trying to find out what is truth and what is fiction with some people.  I'm not talking about blogs or websites where people can be who they want to be or express ideas, feelings and values that they might not do in real life, I'm talking about people who have an impact on your life, either directly or indirectly.

The latest craze on tv are the reality shows and many people will say it's all garbage but I look at it differently.  It's actually given me some insight into people in general and how they view themselves.  I don't watch on a regular basis but I'll tune in once in a while when I have nothing else constructive to do.  In some of these reality shows people portray themselves as honest, caring, compassionate etc but if you watch you see that they are quite the opposite.  People can't be who they are not for very long, eventually their true character comes out and these shows give you a front row seat into other peoples psyche's.

When I look at my own life and how I live it I'm aware of my own failings, trying to improve myself and how I deal with people.  I will tolerate a lot before I say.........enough enough. 

This is where I am now, evaluating the people who surround me and are involved in my life.  Nothing I can do about changing the world but I can change the world around me.

I'd like to be able to have a few drinks with my friends without one of them becoming belligerant and angry after too many.  I'd like to be able to share a confidence with a friend without her blabbing about it to all her friends behind my back.  I'd like to be able to write an e-mail without someone looking over my shoulder trying to read what I'm either reading or writing.  I'd like to wear what I want without criticizm.  These are just some things among many that irritate me.  I could go on and on but if your reading this I'm sure you know people like that yourself.  It's stressful just to be around them.  A few good friends is all I'd really like to have.  I have been lucky to find some and now I have the difficult task of ending a few so-called friendships.  I'm sure I'll be asked why and I'll try to be as honest as I can without hurting some feelings.  Even hypocrites have feelings!

Some of my friends say I talk too much and they are probably right, I'm here aren't I, telling complete strangers things that are going on in my life.  I'm sure that anyone who reads my blog may have a negative opinion of me, well if that's the case, I would like to hear that too.  I'm not on a self-help crusade, I'm just seeking a simple life without the kind of drama that hurts people.

I feel as if I got a bit of that off my chest by just simply writing this.  Ranting does help at times.

Ciao

I'm not going to bore you with what I cooked or didn't cook today or if I walked a dog.....if I had one or tell you I'm depressed even if I was but I do want to share a dream with you.  My dreams are very vivid, usually exciting and in my dreams I can do anything........I'm invincible.  I have been thinking about creating a website for a long time but looking for just the right theme, the right look and since I don't want it to just be about me I didn't want to use my own picture, although I'm sure I'd increase readership if I did.

In my search I was looking for the right kind of look for Wyldefyre.  The one I'm using right now isn't bad and it represents a look and a feel for the way I think.......I'm not a pushover, that's for sure.  I've looked at so much artwork that my eyes are going around in circles, each in the opposite direction if you know what I mean.

I was really impressed with one artist and apparently he's pretty well know and his art work is awesome.  I hope this is the right spelling but his name is Arroyo (last name) so I have to give him the cudo's he deserves for creating the  art that I'm using.  I'm hoping he doesn't charge me.  The look is very close to what Wyldefyre might look like in my imagination except Wyldefyre has red hair.

So this is my dream:

I picture myself as if I'm observing myself from afar.  I'm standing there with my legs slightly apart and I can see that I have a slim but very firm body, strong but not muscular.  I'm wearing some kind of leather tunic that exposes my bare legs but I have a sheath strapped to my left leg, tied around my leg with rawhide. In the sheath rests a mighty long sword, sharp as a razor and as I practise my swordmanship I slice through the air with it and hear the swish of air being cut in half.  On my right hip I have a smaller sheath that holds an equally razor sharp dagger. I watch as Wyldefyre withdraws first the sword by swinging her right hand to her left leg and her left arm to her right hip almost in the same motion.  Like a gunfighter practicing his draw.  My arms are also bare but I have leather wristbands on each wrist and a bracer on my arm that winds around my upper arm with the head of a snake, poised as if to strike.

My hair is very long with soft waves cascading down my back, a brilliant  crimson fire.  My eyes are almond shaped and green as an emerald.  As I practiced with my weapons I heard the sound of hoofbeats in the distance coming closer and closer till I could feel the ground shake under my feet.  As they approached I could  hear the chanting and war whoops of fierce men ready for battle.  I am ready!  I was born for this day.  I was born to lead.  As they get closer I can hear the chant clearer..........Wyldefyre........Wyldefyre and I feel my heart pounding as it hardens for battle.  I whistle for my steed Midnight and await the horde I will lead into battle.

This is Wyldefyre......my alter ego or maybe someone I was in a past life or just my active imagination working overtime again but here she is.  I proudly present........Wyldefyre

The verdict is in and Michael Jackson was found "not guilty", don't get that confused with being innocent because there just wasn't enough evidence to convince the jury beyond a reasonable doubt that he molested this particular boy.  The mother didn't help much by being greedy and probably because of her the case was lost.  Although I think the prosecution could have called some witnesses that could have clarified for the jury exactly how child molesters/pedophiles lure and seduce their victims and families and how they keep these people from talking about their experience.

It's all over now, the verdict is in and that's that but is it?  A pedophile or child molester can not stop and I am a bit concerned about what some of his lawyers, cronies and friends have been saying after the trial.  When asked by many people if Michael Jackson will now stop sleeping with boys not one person answered that question to my satisfaction except to say that Michael Jackson will be more careful who he gets involved with and who he brings into his life.  He was already pretty careful in choosing just the right type of victim so I suppose he's going to be even more secretive about it now.

If anyone still thinks that Michael Jackson is some poor misunderstood man/child then their thinking process and common sense needs a bit of adjusting.  I'm sure that a lot of people will not agree with me and that's ok, my opinion is my opinion among many.  When I think of all the young boys who idolized Michael Jackson, you weren't sleeping with a friend...you were sleeping with the enemy.

I haven't been around for a while because I just had nothing to say nor did I have the energy to sit down at a keyboard and try to be witty or passionate about something until today.  Again I'm starting to feel like this whole world is going crazy around me.  The Michael Jackson trial is getting to me and I'm a bit worried about the repercussions of an aquittal.  The reason I say that is based on the Martin Bashir video where MJ says that sleeping with boy is, in his words......."charming".  I guess every child molester and pedophile is going to say there is nothing wrong with finding them in a bed with a child because it's so "charming".  Children can be so naive when adults manipulate them and child molesters are very adept at that.  MJ had the best playground in the world........the one he created himself.....Neverland.  What child would turn that down even if they felt uncomfortable about what was happening to them.  So many carrots are being dangled in front of them and a master manipulator has chosen victims very carefully, the needy and the greedy.  MJ keeps saying that people are out to scam him and in some cases it may be true but he brings it on himself by throwing money, gifts and trips around like they were mana from above.  He has developed such a complex of superiority that he even names his children "prince" as if they were royalty.  At one time I was an avid fan of Jackson and his music and I wish none of this was true but you have to have your head in the sand not to see that where there is smoke.........surely there is fire.  Why on earth would a man pay out $20,000,000.00 to a family to keep them quiet......quiet about what???  That is a huge price to pay to keep a family silent.  You would think he would have learned by that and taken peoples advice and stayed away from young boys but he's Michael Jackson after all and he got away with it, even though it cost him a mint.  Since then he has paid other families millions of dollars......again.......for what?  These were also young boys that he was apparently inappropriate with.  Then there's the story of a young boy that he spent 365 consecutive days with..........a year ......sleeping with the same boy in his bed.  That constitutes a relationship of some kind......not something "charming".  Now this case and again he put himself in this position by himself.  Why?  Because he can't stop himself, he is attracted to young boys.  His supposed few and far relationships with women including his marriage to Lisa Marie Presley were nothing but shams to throw people off who were beginning to wonder about his sexuality.  He fathered two children by Debbie Rowe by arrangement.  I would take a bet that a dna on those two children would prove that they don't have any of MJ's dna and that she was artificially inseminated by some donor sperm that was hand picked so he could produce the kind of children he wanted.  There are many die hard fans who would never believe anything bad of MJ and unfortunately that is how many people feel about celebrities, musicians, movie stars and sports figures.  They are above the law and because they are so good at what they do they just couldn't do something bad.  Well good people can do bad things and being famous doesn't mean you can't have a dark soul.  I think MJ has thumbed his nose at the public and some of it can be read in his music and some of his crotch grabbing performances.  How can grabbing your crotch be part of a dance number?

I had other things irritating me lately but since the MJ jury is still out I can't help but wonder what the outcome will be.  This charade of back problems seems like a pathetic attempt to gain sympathy for poor MJ who could not possibly survive in prison.  Well, a lot of people should have thought of that before they committed illegal acts.  I keep hearing that this is recurring pain from a past injury (maybe when he was secretly drunk) but I doubt it.  When the trial first started he seemed to be able to jump up on an SUV and dance around with no problem at all.  It's sad to see someone so seemingly intelligent feign these health problems when the 13 year old boy endured cancer and cancer treatments.  How shallow can you get.  If it sounds like I don't like MJ then your right.......I don't any more.  I believe all the allegations against him and even if the boys mother is a flake, even if she is greedy and manipulative, she's certainly no match for Jackson.  He has manipulated us all.  People from all over have entrusted their children to him thinking he's this innocent man/child who thinks he's peter pan.  Well, this peter pan has been able to handle a million dollar empire.  I don't know of a naive man/child ever being able to do that.  Which is the true Michael Jackson?  Even his voice is used to manipulated us.  He talks to the public in this shy quiet voice when in reality the people closest to him know that he doesn't talk like that.  Who is this man in the mirror, who hates himself so much that he keeps wanting to destroy or change what looks back at him when he does look in the mirror.  If anyone in that family was in desperate need of plastic surgery, it was the father.........Joe Jackson.  He looks downright scary!!

I'm going to go out on a limb and predict that he gets off on the real serious charges but found guilty on the minor ones and gets off with some easy probation.  I hope I'm wrong and it won't be long before we all find out.  Lets rid this world of molesters and pedophiles even if we have to do it one at a time.  Each pedophile has countless victims and putting just one away will at least ensure that it doesn't happen to even more children.

That's my opinion.......like it or not.

Ciao

Finally summer has arrived!  It's hot as hell but I have a decision to make.  Should I even bother taking out "all" my summer clothes or just my favorites or enough to get through a short summer season.  If you count the cooler days, rainy days, dull overcast days and windy days, we don't have much of a summer left.  I wonder how people who live in tropical countries deal with the same kind of weather year round?  At least having four seasons cuts down on the boredom and gives you a variety of things do do besides floating in a pool, fanning yourself under an umbrella while some handsome waiter brings you cold, frosty drinks.........what am I saying........that's the life I like most of all.  A lovely thought for when the weather is freezing, the snow is four feet high and you can hear the wind howling outside.  Even though I'm looking forward to summer I'm already looking ahead to when I can escape the cold and enjoy a little more summer weather.

Ciao

I'm not sure why other people blog but I do it to get things off my chest (36B) all natural too, but to read what other bloggers write.  Getting to know people and how they think about themselves, the world around them, their experiences is interesting and I hope people find me interesting too.  I might complain about the crappy things in life but I'm a basically pretty normal if somewhat outrageous and flamboyant at times.  I can rant about something but then I can let it go.  In reading other people's blogs I'm convinced that there are many certifiable loonies out there and I guess they need a voice or need to be heard too but reading some of the stuff they write is downright scary.  Don't get me wrong...I don't scare easily, I'm still glad they are in cyberspace and not living next door to me.  I'd be interested in knowing if what I'm writing is of interest to anyone and I don't know that unless you leave a comment.  Maybe I need to spice things up a bit but don't worry I'll be creating a little spicy category for when I'm in a spicy, feisty kinda mood.

When anyone asks where I'm from I tell them I'm a Canadian Snow Bunny and yes we have indoor plumbing, paved streets and even lectricity!  I'm amazed at times that a lot of people think everyone in Canada is French well we have a large population of french speaking people but they are concentrated in one province.........Quebec.  I don't like revealing too much about my personal life to complete strangers because this is more about how I feel about things and not about being lonely or needing someone to talk to.  I love to talk to people from all over the world but out of interest and not need.  I've travelled a lot, seen a lot, done a lot and by the way...I'm under 30.  How's that for a revelation.  If you read something you like, make a comment...if I want to be read then I should be writing something that someone wants to read.

Ciao

I've been wracking my brain trying to learn about web pages, web sites and blogs.  I can learn just about anything but when it comes to computers I seem to have some kind of mental block.  I have this image of what I want my web site to look like but it seems I'm asking a bit too much.  I've been told that what I want is pretty complicated but I'm stubborn.......I want what I want!!  That's a redhead for you!

I did run across a website that had animations and that's part of what I want to include.  This website was pretty creative and had a woman who appears to be walking.  It's pretty cool.  It's not quite the look I want but it gives me hope that maybe I can get what I'm looking for.  I don't want a woman who walks but I want her hair and long gown to appear as if it's billowing in the breeze.  So day after day I surf around to see if I can find what I'm looking for with no success.  The last resort would be paying someone to do it for me but since I'm not ridiculously wealthy, I'll have to wait.

Anyway I'm going to try and put that one animation in here for you to see so if you don't see it, it means I couldn't do it whaaaaaaaaa.  If there are any experts out there that feel like doing anything pro-bono to help out a newbie, pleaseeeeeee don't hesitate to get in touch with me. 

I tried to add the animation into the body of this blog but I couldn't for some reason, probably cause I'm doing it wrong but it did go into my album so take a look.  Now this is what taking a walk on the wild side looks like.

Ciao

You must have been wondering what the heck Feral Moans was all about so I'm sorry if I mislead you but it's a play on words.  What I actually meant was "Pheramones".  You know that thing you can't put your finger on but it drives you crazy when your near someone.  I prefer to call it "Animal Magnetism".  We use all kinds of scents to attract the opposite sex, we pay attention to the way we dress and act but when it comes down to it the natural scent exuding from someone's body is powerful.  I'd hate to think how it must have been in cave man days but even then I'm sure that there was one caveman that all the cavewomen drooled over and since he wasn't dressed in a Versacce suit, it had to be the pheramones.

I can still remember walking by a construction site and although I almost salivated at the tanned, muscular bodies, there was an odor in the air that disappeared the further I got from the work site.  There is something about a masculine odor, especially if the guy is working hard physically that I find quite attractive in a feral scene.  It just brings up all these erotic images.  I don't think I should go into detail, at least not now.  Suffice it to say that Pheramones can produce some feral moans.

Even perfume manufacturer's are bottling pheramones now because they know the power of scent.  The movie "Scent of a Woman" kind of shows you how someone who is blind has a razor sharp sense of smell.  The next time you are in a mall or a crowded place, close your eyes and listen to you nose.

I don't like an overpowering perfume on a woman or cologne on a man (or aftershave).  Some people go a bit overboard when something subtle or just a clean smell is much more attractive.  You can sweat (men) or perspire(women) and still smell good.  I've often wondered exactly why some people have a nasty body odor because unless it's something chemically wrong a clean body should smell nice.

I've tried many perfumes and pretty much have one for every mood.  An indoor one, an outdoor one, a winter one, summer one and I have a few favorites.  The ones I'm trying out now are "Truth" by Kalvin Kline and "Cool Water".  Even the names can be a draw in picking one out.

Speaking of Pheramones, there a cologne for men called "Pheramone" by Marilyn Miglin.  Like I said, I guess perfume manufacturers are catching on to this phenomenon. 

I got a laugh out of some names when I did a little search on perfumes and colognes.  Names like Time Bomb...sounds a bit too explosive for me.  Insatiable...that one is kinda self-explanatory as is ..Indecent.  I have no idea who would wear a cologne called "Goofy", that one is by Disney so I just can't see a grown man wearing that.  One I'm definitely going to check out is called "Fcuk" by French Connection.  I might have to see an eye doctor because I think I have some letters mixed up on that one but maybe they thought the same thing I did.  Maybe the French Connection can't spell but I'm sure everyone can figure out what they were trying to say when they named it.  Chuckle!!!  Now I'm on a mission to find more perfumes and cologne's so I might be back with more of  my favorites.

Ciao

I can't for the life of me understand the prosecutors in the Michael Jackson case.  They should have known that the defence would put on a parade of people who would praise him and say he's the best and knock everyone who says anything against him.  Michael Jackson is the slyest kind of predator because he goes after people who have weaknesses already and he knows will be blinded by money, gifts, trips and royal treatment.  He uses this to lure then and then turns around and says they all want something from him.  Instead of the prosecution bringing on an expert witness about battered women syndrome to dissipate some of the damage the victims own mother has done, the prosecution would have been better off to bring on an expert witness to explain to the jury how a pedophile or child molester lures their victims in and then proceeds to seduce them carefully and slowly.  Sometimes the child doesn't even know exactly what is going on except wow, they are getting all this attention from the great Michael Jackson.

The most telling thing to me is how long this has been going on.  Michael Jackson has been paying people off for years to make this stuff go away and here we are again, another child, another accusation.  It is very clear that Michael Jackson can not stop what he's doing, like most child molesters and pedophiles.  If he was smart and if none of this was true, he would make sure he never had a strange child in his bed again but he continues to do that.  He has children of his own now, children bought and paid for that don't even contain any of his dna.  I would really question why he wanted children at all but since he has them, why does he still want strange boys in his bed if it's only about loving children and wanting to do the best for them.  Having them sleep in his bed is not in the best interest of a child.

This case really irritates me, and all these so called friends of Michael Jackson would rather protect him and let him go on abusing children than to force him to face his problem.  The face that Michael Jackson wears is truly a mask and maybe he doesn't even like looking at it himself so he keeps changing it.